“Why wouldn’t he want to date me?! I’m adorable!"
“Well, I went on a date with a conspiracy theorist….somehow we started talking about politics and it just went downhill from there. He thinks Aids and Cancer are not real.”
“Today I went to H&M. Spent $90. And I thought to myself, “Self…you have really outdone yourself.”
“Wait‑ I thought you were on a boy fast.”
“I am. This date is just going to be a little snack.”
“Junior Year of high school. That was my year. I went on 3 dates a week.”
“Well…got my annual text from Boy. At 10:30. On a Saturday night. Texted me the same thing as last time. I swear he must have a schedule and a list of girls and like clockwork, will text them every couple months just to keep them as “options”.
Things that Boys say to Us...
“Do you curse other guys besides me with Harry Potter curses?"
“Well Char, if you stay up past your 9 o’clock grandma curfew your mind will be blown about what happens at night.”
Date: “Why aren’t you married yet?”
Me: (sarcastically) “I don’t know...Why aren’t you married yet?”
Date: “Oh, I could be. LOTS of options.”
7 year old boy to Gertie: “Why aren’t you married? I have an uncle who isn’t married. He’s lonely. You should marry him. He’s 40.”
Date: “Hey look! There’s a hitch-hiker! We should pick him up! Can you scoot over so he has room to sit by you?”
Boy: “Hey I just wanted to introduce myself, I see you around a lot.
Me: (in my mind) "You humongous idiot!
WE’VE BEEN ON A DATE!!!!"
WE’VE BEEN ON A DATE!!!!"
(out loud) "Oh hey…nice to meet you."
Kind of Awkward,
Gert and Char
I cannot even believe that last one. REALLY??? That is the HEIGHT of awkward.
ReplyDeleteAnd seriously, where are all these rude people??? "Why aren't you married yet?" Who SAYS that? Have we time-warped back into the 19th CENTURY? Gracious, mercy me, a gentleman caller!
You curse guys with Harry Potter curses? That's just awesome.
ReplyDeletehumongous idiot. for real
ReplyDeleteget outttt. your date did not really ask you why you aren't married yet. that question right there is why he is't married yet. bahahaa! i just wanted to introduce myself when in reality we've already been on a date. idiot.
ReplyDeleteI really wanted to be your 10,000 viewer, but 98 people beat me. humongous idiot! Please tell me Mr. A.N. said that you were a grandma, I can just hear him saying it right now
ReplyDeleteI want to hang out with you guys. How do you feel about girl dates? ;)
ReplyDeletep.s. nominated your blog for an award on my blog. congrats!
I definitely love the Harry Potter comment! Best Line Ever!
ReplyDelete“Do you curse other guys besides me with Harry Potter curses?"
ReplyDeleteThat reflects on you and makes you look like one of the COOLEST PEOPLE EVER.