Thursday, April 19, 2012

Relationship Traffic Jam

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For embarrassing reasons we are not going to divulge, we have decided that everyone needs to start wearing small traffic signs around their necks indicating relationship status. 


(Listen boy, how was I supposed to know you had a girlfriend?! You were talking to me! Don’t talk to me unless you have motives to date me. It messes with my mind too much.)

ANYWAYS….

This traffic light procedure would be incredibly helpful at parties. That way you would know what boys to leave alone and what boys you should get your flirt on for.

            Side note: Dear married people. We love having you at parties. BUT STICK WITH YOUR   SIGNIFICANT OTHER! If you are by yourself you look eligible.

Our proposition:

You should wear green if you are:

Not currently dating someone
Would like to be dating someone
Would like to cuddle with someone 
Would like a first date
Want to be flirty, even if just for tonight


You should wear yellow if you:

Have gone on multiple dates with the same person
Are interested in starting to date said person
Have recently kissed someone but not positive you’re gonna date them
Not super interested in meeting new people because you have to deal with the hot mess that’s already in your social life.

You should wear red if:

Someone calls you ‘boyfriend/girlfriend” or “husband/wife”.

 Possible Additions to Relationship Road Signs

Some 3rd party should assign additional signs such as:

§  Hazards lie ahead
§  Yield
§  Multiple Delays
§  Turn Back Now
§  Danger!

...to boys who are bad news.


That would have saved us a lot of time. And embarrassment.

Stuck in traffic,

Gertrude and Charlotte

7 comments:

  1. perfect. red it totally my color anyway.
    such a great system.

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  2. Have you ever been to a stoplight party? Everyone has to wear which colour they currently are to the party... my university had them often. They were fun! And effective!

    Also I just found your blog and must say it's sweet.

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  3. Haha! Char and Gert, you are brilliant ladies, as usual. I have a recommendation: I want to know what is in your purse(s). What should I always have on hand to keep the boys a comin'?

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  4. i feel like i'm at a light that can't decide if it's green or yellow so i'm stuck in the intersection with cars all around honking and hating on me. i hate the traffic of dating.

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    Replies
    1. I am in the EXACT same boat. It sucks....

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  5. This is such a great idea!! I wish this kinda thing actually happened..!

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  6. We have those Stoplight parties that The Management mentioned above at pubs every now and then. I've never gone to one because it just seems way too obvious but I think for everyday wear, this is totally acceptable. Let's put this into action.

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